When life feels overwhelming, this therapeutic hack can guide your thoughts back to safety in seconds
We’ve all heard the saying: ‘You look like you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders.’ And right now, it probably feels that way when you scroll through the headlines.
A YoungMinds survey reports that 82% of young people in the UK are worried about political events, and in 2021, the Office for National Statistics reported that 75% of adults were worried about climate change. When combined with burnout and the cost of living crisis, it can feel like you’re being swept away by an all-consuming current of emotional overwhelm. But neuro-linguistic programming therapy, or NLP, is a technique that helps you understand how you process your thoughts and feelings, acting as a powerful anchor in unsettling times.
This won’t fix everything that’s wrong with the world, but it can calm your nervous system, and give you back control when those waves of fear inevitably come crashing in.
1. Anchor your language
According to master NLP coach Chantal Dempsey, this technique creates calm through self-suggestion. “When you choose the words you use consciously, they become instructions for your body and brain, and create a powerful internal anchor,” she explains.
Choose a phrase that evokes calm and safety – something that’s soothing and true for you. Try something like: ‘Let yourself settle now.’ ‘Breathe into ease.’ ‘I am getting calmer and calmer.’
Repeat it slowly, rhythmically, and with real intention (out loud or in your mind), like a mantra you can return to when things feel shaky.
2. Ground your senses
When anxiety hits, your brain often shifts into fight-or-flight mode, making it harder to think clearly or feel in control. Sensory anchoring helps bring your awareness away from the mental noise, and back to the tangible here and now.
“By deliberately tuning-in to your senses, you signal safety to the nervous system, and begin to down-regulate heightened emotional states,” Chantal says. Start by gently placing one hand over your heart or stomach, and notice the warmth and weight of your touch. Then, slowly engage your senses by naming three things you can see, three things you can hear, and three things you can touch.
3. Pace your future
This one is about mentally stepping into the calm, capable version of yourself, and letting your brain rehearse success. “Research [from the University of Colorado at Boulder] shows that the brain responds to imagined experiences as if they are real,” Chantal explains. “They activate the same neural pathways that fire during actual action.”
According to Chantal, this technique is called ‘future pacing’, where you visualise how you want to think, feel, and behave in a given moment.
“Close your eyes, and take a slow breath. Imagine the calmest, most grounded version of yourself handling the situation with ease. Picture it as vividly as possible,” she says.
Then, keep visualising this version of you, and take one small action they would take. When you feel intrusive thoughts start to creep in, or anxiety makes you feel a little wobbly, try pausing, standing taller, or gently shifting your inner dialogue. The more often you do this, the more familiar calm becomes.
4. Control your thoughts
This NLP tool is about regulating emotions by adjusting how your brain is representing an experience. “The brain encodes our internal experiences using sensory elements called ‘submodalities’,” Chantal explains. “Things like the size, colour, distance, volume, or brightness of an image can all influence how emotionally charged a thought or memory feels to us.”
Chantal recommends connecting with the unwanted thought or feeling – such as worrying that something terrible will happen to a loved one – and creating a mental image of it. Then, imagine a control panel full of dials, levers, and buttons in front of you.
“Start adjusting the image using the panel,” Chantal says. “Maybe dim the colours, move it farther away, or turn the volume down. This simple tweak in how you see the thought can soften its emotional weight, and return a sense of control.”
5. Create a ‘wow’ moment
This technique helps you capture a powerful emotional state, and anchor it to a physical gesture. “Once anchored, this gesture becomes a fast, reliable way to access that empowering state again whenever you need it,” Chantal says.
She suggests recalling a ‘wow’ moment – a time when you felt strong, grounded, fully alive, or in flow. This might be a memory of being surrounded by loved ones, stepping out of your comfort zone, or achieving a personal goal. The more sensory detail, the better.
“At the peak of that emotion, press two fingers together, and hold for a few seconds,” explains Chantal. “This is your anchor gesture. Using it can teach your nervous system that this gesture equals this emotional state.”
Release and repeat as often as you like. With practice, Chantal believes it will become a shortcut to calm and confidence in the moments when you need it most.
Comments