From holding a beach ball underwater to trying to fix the roof in a storm, discover the power of metaphors when it comes to expressing difficult feelings
Sometimes, it’s hard to find the right words to describe what we’re going through. The feelings can be too big, too complex, and sometimes just too elusive to sum up – and we can find ourselves struggling to express how we’re feeling or what we need.
This is where metaphors step in. A common, evidence-based tool sometimes used in talking therapies to capture these incomprehensive feelings, metaphors are creative or symbolic ways of talking about things, and can help us to see our experiences from another angle.
Here, we’re rounding up 10 mental health metaphors, and delving into what they can tell us about the things we feel, and the journeys we’re on.
1. Anxiety is a smoke detector
There’s a reason why every house should have a smoke detector – it senses danger and saves lives. It’s always there, working in the background, and when it gets a whiff of a fire it allows you to act quickly to get yourself and loved ones to safety. However, sometimes the smoke alarm goes off when you’ve burnt toast.
Like a smoke detector, anxiety is there to alert us to danger. When we’re anxious, our body goes into flight or fight mode, preparing us to deal with whatever threat is coming our way. But it could be that the ‘threat’ is a speeding car we didn’t see coming, or it could be walking into a room where we don’t know anyone – two very different scenarios, same reaction.
Like a smoke detector, anxiety can’t distinguish between real and perceived threats, and so the reaction is the same for both. Knowing this allows us to understand why our bodies are reacting the way they are – offering a moment of pause for us to take back control.
2. You can’t walk 10 miles into the forest, and expect to get back out in five
This one is all about understanding the importance of giving yourself time and patience when it comes to addressing mental health problems. The things that you are experiencing could have built up over a long period of time, so it wouldn’t be fair to expect yourself to be able to just shrug them off overnight.
That’s not to say that there’s an exact science to recovering (for example, if anxiety has built up over two months, it’s not necessarily going to take an equal amount of time to feel better), but this metaphor helps address how important patience and realistic goals are on this journey.
3. The black dog
The idea of depression or low mood being like a ‘black dog’ that follows you around is often attributed to Winston Churchill. The International Churchill Society disputes the assumption that Churchill himself lived with depression, and the metaphor actually goes back to the Roman poet Horace – but, nonetheless, the image has struck a chord with many who do live with depression.
Here, the idea is that depression is something that follows you around in the background; it can feel menacing at times, while at others it may blend into the shadows – but its presence is a constant weight on your mind.
4. You can’t pour from an empty cup
If there’s nothing left to give, you can’t share it out, right? This metaphor is referring to the importance of taking care of your emotional wellbeing before trying to support others, or taking on more responsibility.
Imagine your energy levels are held in a cup, and every challenge you face throughout the day depletes it a little until you end up with nothing left. You need to ‘refill your cup’, with restorative self-care activities before you can pour some of your emotional energy into another cup (i.e. supporting a friend or completing a difficult task).
5. Holding a beach ball under the water
Imagine you’re in a swimming pool, and you’ve got one of those inflatable beach balls with you. You push it under the water, and hold it there. For a while, everything’s fine but, eventually, the pressure becomes too much, or you lose your grip a little, and the beach ball comes flying to the surface and up into the air – potentially smacking you in the face on its way.
In this image, the beach ball represents repressed feelings. Yes, you can hold them under the surface temporarily, but after some time, they’re going to break free, and they could make quite the splash when they do.
6. The ‘check engine’ light
Just like the warning lights on a car dashboard, negative emotions can indicate that something isn’t right – but then it’s up to us to figure out precisely what the problem is. Now, unlike a car, humans don’t come with an instruction manual, but we can give ourselves an emotional ‘service’ by exploring what these feelings could be telling us.
For example, feeling more irritable than usual could tell us we’re overworking. Feeling on edge may be a sign that there’s something bigger troubling us below the surface. Feeling apathetic is sometimes a sign that we need to spend some time recharging.
7. Trauma is like sunburn
This one is technically a simile, but the message is the same. You can think of trauma like sunburn – something happens to you and it results in pain and discomfort. Like with sunburn, you can also feel very sensitive – and when the sunburn is bad, you definitely need to stay out of the sun for a while.
8. Bad climate vs bad weather
Am I in a bad climate, or is it bad weather? This is something you can ask yourself when you want to check in about something you’re experiencing.
‘Bad weather’ would refer to a temporary feeling – for example, a low mood – and the key thing is that it does eventually pass. Whereas ‘bad climate’ is referencing larger, chronic problems – in this example, it could be depression. Whether you’re in a bad climate or bad weather will determine your next steps, so it’s one to ponder on.
9. The uninvited party guest
No one likes intrusive thoughts – the kind of thoughts that turn up unexpectedly, dominate your mind and distract you from things you should be enjoying, just like an uninvited party guest.
Now you have an uninvited guest at your party, and they’re sucking the joy out of the room – so, what are you going to do about it? On one hand, you could confront them and ask them to leave, but there’s a chance you could waste the whole party battling with them. Or, the other option is to acknowledge that they’re there, but then focus on having a good time anyway. Which will it be?
10. Fixing the holes in the roof
Say you’ve got some holes in the roof of your house that are causing a leak. You know you need to fix it, but when do you get to work? Well, you’re probably not going to have much luck if you try repairing the holes in the middle of a rain storm. You need to wait for the storm to pass before you can do a real fix – but you can still put down buckets to keep things under control.
This metaphor is all about focusing on realistic fixes while you’re in the thick of things. Your ‘buckets’ might be reaching out to people you trust, taking some time off to focus on feeling better, or booking an appointment to begin professional support. These things make all the difference now, and then allow you to focus on the big repairs once the eye of the storm has passed.
So, which metaphors and images resonate with you? It could be one explored here, or you might find that there’s a completely different way of describing something you’re going through, but which perfectly communicates the heart of the problem. Whatever it is, this handy tool can make all the difference in not only better understanding ourselves and others, but conveying that, too.
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