Get crafty about gifting, and be inspired to make something truly meaningful for your nearest and dearest

I spend the afternoon in the kitchen, listening to music while I weigh out raisins, cocoa powder, and golden syrup. I’m making a batch of chocolate tiffin, ready to put into small tubs that I’ll tie with ribbon to give to friends.

Creative gifting is about putting thought, time, and effort into making something special for someone else. Often, it’s as a present for an occasion like Christmas or a birthday, but equally can be nice ‘just because’.

The wellbeing boost of creative gifting

“When we give to another, we really are giving to ourselves, and this is particularly so if it is us who is making the gift,” explains psychotherapist Clare Patterson, discussing the wellbeing boost we can get from hand-making. “Doing things for others can bring enormous joy. It reminds us of our shared connection, and in this being something we make ourselves, it is even more personal and meaningful.”

There is also the joy that comes with doing something creative. “Crafting a gift for someone else is a form of self-expression,” Clare says. “We put a lot of ourselves into something we make – our natural creativity. In offering this to another, we are really showing them who we are, and when this is received, it can feel wonderful and self-affirming.”

When baking, I find I relax, and can get into a flow state. It’s a pleasant way to spend a couple of hours, and I enjoy being able to do something different. It’s also incredibly satisfying that the tiffin I make is my version of a recipe I’ve adapted over time, so it feels more personal.

Receiving a gift

Of course, the intention behind creating something special for someone we care about is to show them this, and naturally, we want them to benefit from this, too. “When we receive a handmade present, we are being offered the truest and most sincere form of gift – something pure and unique from the other person,” Clare says. “It is not ‘material’. Its meaning is much deeper than that. While it may have a material use – perhaps it is a hand-painted pot or a hanging basket – what is so special is the source. The person giving this to us is offering us something of themselves – their presence, and their creativity. This is very special and to be treasured.”

There can be a tendency to go into ‘rescuer’ mode, and want to fix the other person, as it’s so painful to observe their hurt (7).jpg

Speaking with Clare, I think about one of my friends who loves to cross stitch. When I moved house a few years ago, she gave me and my husband a framed cross stitch of Milhouse from The Simpsons which included the quote “Everything’s Coming Up Milhouse!” The Simpsons reference genuinely made me laugh, and every time I see the cross stitch on the mantelpiece, I’m reminded that my friend spent time making this for us. She knows we love classic episodes of The Simpsons, so there’s an extra meaning there in that she chose something she knew would make us smile.

Crafting a gift

Knowing where to start when it comes to crafting a gift can feel a little daunting. Even if you already make gifts for others, you may still find self-doubt creeps in.

“It is very easy, in a materialistic society, to fall into the trap of thinking what matters is our output. What is truly most important in the making of a gift is ourselves. A good friend will appreciate this,” says Clare.

“We all have different talents and skills, and we all have different interests. Some of us are drawn to woodwork, others clay, others needlework, or maybe painting,” adds Clare. “Choose an art that feels enjoyable to you. The best gift you can give is the authenticity you put into creating your craft – the finished object is just the portal for this. It is very important that you choose something that feels right for you. Create for yourself, and then share this with others. You can’t go wrong with that.”

It’s normal to feel a little unsure about what to make. “What would you like to receive from another person?” asks Clare. “What would you like to make for yourself? Are you interested in food or baking? What about a scrapbook or hand-decorated journal? You will create something beautiful and meaningful when it feels special to you, so take some time to explore what this might look like, and trust yourself.”

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When one of my best friends was graduating from university, I made her a zine that had lots of things I knew she’d like, such as in-jokes, recipes, and photos. She’s an artist, and we’d spoken about making zines before, and we also have a similar sense of humour, so I knew it would go down well. Since then, every so often we gift each other things like this – she painted me a canvas with another in-joke that would make sense to no one else, but that I love!

If you’re still feeling stuck, try looking online for craft ideas, and see if there’s one that resonates with you. It can help to practise before making the ‘final’ version that you’ll give to a friend, especially if it’s something you’ve not done before.

And, of course, it’s OK if you decide creative gifting isn’t for you. For all the times I’ve done creative gifting, there are loved ones who I know would rather I buy them that book from their Christmas list instead of making them a present. And that’s OK. But if you do decide to give creative gifting a try, remember to let yourself enjoy the process of making something and expressing yourself.