Are you weighed down by the stress of working towards a lofty goal? New research suggests that the healthiest thing to do may be to give up, but not entirely...

We’re often told that success is all about pushing harder and never giving up. But new research suggests an alternative view, that sometimes, the healthiest thing we can do is let it go.

The research, led by Curtin University, has found that releasing genuinely unachievable goals can significantly boost mental and physical wellbeing. Even more encouraging, shifting your focus toward fresh, more attainable goals, can restore our sense of purpose as well as boost resilience and life satisfaction.

Finding flexibility

Published in the journal Nature Human Behaviour, the review analysed 235 studies drawn from psychology, health, and social science. Together, these studies offered more than 1,400 insights into how people adjust their goals when life doesn’t go according to plan. The findings were surprisingly positive, suggesting that flexibility, not relentless persistence, is often the healthier path to success.

Lead researcher Dr Hugh Riddell from the Curtin School of Population Health says the findings challenge the long-held idea that quitting is a sign of weakness.

“Sticking with impossible goals can take a real toll,” Dr Riddell explains. “Research shows it can heighten stress levels, impact wellbeing, and even contribute to physical health issues. But learning to let go – and, crucially, to reengage with new goals – was consistently linked to improved mood and restored purpose.”

Goal processing

The review highlights two powerful processes that help people navigate setbacks in pursuit of goals: 

  1. Disengaging with goals: When people let go of goals that are no longer realistic, they experience reductions in stress, anxiety, and depressive symptoms.
  2. Reengaging with new goals: Redirecting energy toward meaningful, achievable targets leads to increased life satisfaction, stronger resilience, and a boost in optimism.

That second point is important. It’s a dual process that is about more than simply giving up; it’s about moving forward with compassion and clarity.

Doing what's right for you

Researchers also emphasise that the process of adjusting your goals is an individual experience, with the ability to pivot being influenced by a multitude of factors, such as personality traits, coping styles, access to social support networks, life history, health, and age.

“There’s no one-size-fits-all roadmap,” says Dr Riddell. “Motivation, stress management skills, relationship stability, and even childhood experiences play a role in how we approach our goals. This study helps map out the many influences behind flexible goal-setting and the benefits it brings.”

So, for anyone who has ever clung tightly to a dream that no longer feels possible, these findings offer reassurance that you’re not failing, you’re perhaps being offered the chance to release unnecessary stress and readjust your image for the future. 

But how do we know when it’s time to make that change? The next phase of the research is planned to explore this in more detail. As Dr Riddell notes, “Understanding when to hold on and when to change course – without giving up too early – is the next piece of the puzzle.”

For now, the good news is that although persistence has its place, so does giving yourself permission to move on.