Step up to the challenge in simple, practical ways
"It takes a village to raise a child.” It’s a popular phrase, and one that rings particularly true for those who are parenting without a partner. Single parents face unique challenges as they are managing all aspects of parenting alone, while also balancing work, financial responsibilities, and personal wellbeing.
“The emotional strain can be significant, as they may not have someone to share the burdens of decision-making, caregiving, and day-to-day tasks,” psychotherapist Tina Chummun explains. On top of this, social isolation is also common for single parents. “They have less time and energy for personal relationships, leaving them with fewer opportunities for emotional support and relaxation,” Tina says.
“Alongside the financial stress of raising a child alone, the cumulative effect of these factors can lead to severe stress, burnout, emotional exhaustion, and a heightened sense of loneliness,” she adds.
If you have a single parent in your life, whether it’s a family member or friend, supporting them can play a crucial role in alleviating some of these ongoing pressures.
“Providing this type of consistent, practical support can make a significant impact on both the emotional and physical wellbeing of single parents, helping them feel less alone in their parenting journey,” Tina says. While it can be difficult to know the best way to support someone, the following suggestions are a good start.
Check in regularly
Consistent communication is vital. “When you regularly check-in with the single parent, you ensure they feel supported and know they have someone to turn to. This creates a reliable safety net where the parent feels comfortable reaching out when they’re overwhelmed or need to talk,” Tina explains.
At first, figuring out the flow of this, and the best means of communication, may take a little trial and error, but you will soon fall into a rhythm with it. If in doubt, ask the parent what they find to be the most helpful. For example, asking if they would prefer a weekly phone call or more regular WhatsApp check-ins.
Offer to look after their children
Naturally, most people don’t always want to ask for help, especially when it comes to something like childcare. It’s important, therefore, to take the initiative and offer to spend time with their children through regular visits, outings, or activities.
“This not only gives the single parent a break, but also provides the children with additional role models and positive relationships,” Tina says. “Offering to take the children to the park, for example, can help the parent recharge while still knowing their kids are cared for,” she adds. If you have your own children, inviting them along to your family activities without their parent is always a nice idea, to give the parent a bit of a breather.
Help out with practical tasks
Single parents are busy people, and always tight for time as they balance childcare, work, and other responsibilities. Any help with day-to-day tasks can feel like a big gift.
“Offer to help with practical tasks, such as grocery shopping, picking up the kids, or cooking a meal. These small gestures can make a huge difference in easing the daily load,” Tina suggests.
Instead of saying something vague like, “Let me know if you need anything,” sometimes it is easier to offer specific suggestions, for example: “I am going to the shops tomorrow evening, do you want me to pick you up some bits for the weekend? I could drop them off at yours on my way back.”
Make time for the parent, too
While single parents always appreciate a little alone time while you look after the kids, they will almost certainly be craving some adult companionship or socialising, too.
“Offering to go out with them for a coffee or a meal provides a much-needed break, and a chance for them to connect socially, reducing feelings of isolation,” Tina says. Although single parents might have less free time than parents in a couple, it is also important to make an effort to invite them to social events. This way, they don’t feel excluded.
Be flexible and non-judgemental
The reality is that life for a single parent can be busy and unpredictable, so it’s important to accept and respect this. Try to put yourself in their shoes if plans change at the last minute, or they can’t offer you as much support as you can in return at this moment in time. “Offering flexible and non-judgemental support, where they feel no guilt in accepting help, allows them to manage their responsibilities without the fear of burdening others,” Tina explains.
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